Posts
If you thought the picture of our daughters was lovely, have a look at these grandgirls!
Could they be any cuter?
Jun 27, 2009
Precious Grandgirls
If you thought the picture of our daughters was lovely, have a look at these grandgirls!
Could they be any cuter?
Jun 21, 2009
Thoughts on Fathers' Day
My own father died nearly 55 years ago, so it’s no longer a big deal that he’s not around; he would be closing in on 100 years old by now, so most likely gone anyway. I have to admit, though, that I do allow myself to feel a little bit sorry for myself on Fathers’ Day. He was a good and loving dad, funny and gentle and generous with his three daughters. I like to assume that he would have continued to be a positive influence on my life and that we would have grown to have a close relationship as I grew older. Why not imagine the best that could be? Who really knows?
I was only thirteen when he was suddenly just… not there. He died in a horrible one-car accident. At age thirteen, I think I must have been in love with my dad. (Perhaps at age fourteen I would have found fault in everything he said and did, but we never had to suffer through that.) I lived for the times when he was at home. He was a traveling salesman, gone for a couple of days or a couple of weeks at a time, depending on the customers on his regular route, and our lives were built on “when Daddy was coming home”.
Needless to say, there was a huge, empty hole in my life when he died (as there was in my mother’s and sisters’ lives). Home never meant the same after he was gone, and though my mother tried valiantly, her own grief overshadowed her ability to give me what I needed. I finished high school and went many miles away to college before I began to discover who I might be without a father.
One of the reasons I have the husband that I do is that I felt he would be a good father. Observing him with his nieces and nephews, I realized that they liked him and laughed a lot, a big selling point. He had an impossibly high standard to live up to, because in my mind it was as though my own father had achieved sainthood, but I think he did a pretty good job of being a father to our four offspring.
Now our kids are grown, and one of them has fathered children of his own. As far as I can tell, and recognizing a certain bias, I would say he is a wonderful father. I recognize, however, that it’s horribly unfair to give any man a grade on how well he rates as a father. Even his own children have impossible expectations, and that goes both ways… some fathers have impossible expectations of their children as well. So it’s a good thing we have Fathers’ Day when they can be treated in special ways… given gifts and hugs and thanks… receive cards and emails and phone calls.
Personally, I think it should be called Dads’ Day, though, because it’s easy to father a child but much harder to be a good dad.
I was only thirteen when he was suddenly just… not there. He died in a horrible one-car accident. At age thirteen, I think I must have been in love with my dad. (Perhaps at age fourteen I would have found fault in everything he said and did, but we never had to suffer through that.) I lived for the times when he was at home. He was a traveling salesman, gone for a couple of days or a couple of weeks at a time, depending on the customers on his regular route, and our lives were built on “when Daddy was coming home”.
Needless to say, there was a huge, empty hole in my life when he died (as there was in my mother’s and sisters’ lives). Home never meant the same after he was gone, and though my mother tried valiantly, her own grief overshadowed her ability to give me what I needed. I finished high school and went many miles away to college before I began to discover who I might be without a father.
One of the reasons I have the husband that I do is that I felt he would be a good father. Observing him with his nieces and nephews, I realized that they liked him and laughed a lot, a big selling point. He had an impossibly high standard to live up to, because in my mind it was as though my own father had achieved sainthood, but I think he did a pretty good job of being a father to our four offspring.
Now our kids are grown, and one of them has fathered children of his own. As far as I can tell, and recognizing a certain bias, I would say he is a wonderful father. I recognize, however, that it’s horribly unfair to give any man a grade on how well he rates as a father. Even his own children have impossible expectations, and that goes both ways… some fathers have impossible expectations of their children as well. So it’s a good thing we have Fathers’ Day when they can be treated in special ways… given gifts and hugs and thanks… receive cards and emails and phone calls.
Personally, I think it should be called Dads’ Day, though, because it’s easy to father a child but much harder to be a good dad.
Jun 9, 2009
Daughters!
Just in case you missed it on Mike's blog, here is the best picture from the time spent in South Bend June 7th and 8th. Danielle and Miki, the amazing and wonderful daughters of Mike and Diane. Wasn't it just yesterday when they were small?
If you want to see more great pictures of the Bird family, go here and type "portraits from South Bend" in the search box at the top left of the page.
Jun 6, 2009
R.I.P.
Mike’s dad passed away in his sleep Thursday night after a long and painful struggle with colon cancer. He had been ill and failing for a number of years, experiencing a gradual decline in his health. The promise of release from suffering makes death more welcome, but still his family is saddened by the loss of his presence. He was a highly intelligent and talented teacher, writer and editor, with an interest in a multitude of subjects and the ability to pass on that enthusiasm. His mind remained sharp and clear to the end, for which I am certain he was grateful, as were the members of his family. Though he outlived many of his friends, those he had were strong and loyal.
He had eight children, none of whom thought of him as a particularly good father, but rather spoke of the tremendous impact and influence he had on their lives. While he sometimes was belittling, confusing, demanding and maddening, at the same time he expected and encouraged his children to use their minds and their curiosity and their intelligence to explore and research the many facets of their world.
I saw him as a man with a brilliant mind, but also the common inability of geniuses to exhibit common sense or to cope with practicalities. His expectations for people were beyond what most could ever provide for him, so I suppose he was both disappointed and despairing of making ordinary connections with people.
While at home, he spent most of his hours in his library, reading, studying and writing. His self-imposed loneliness included drinking, and at times he became a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde personality. Unfortunately, that behavior alienated me and some others like me. Still, there’s no denying that he was an interesting person, whom one would very much like to get to know. Some did, and because their forgiveness knew no bounds, these are the ones who will miss him the most. … and so it goes.
He had eight children, none of whom thought of him as a particularly good father, but rather spoke of the tremendous impact and influence he had on their lives. While he sometimes was belittling, confusing, demanding and maddening, at the same time he expected and encouraged his children to use their minds and their curiosity and their intelligence to explore and research the many facets of their world.
I saw him as a man with a brilliant mind, but also the common inability of geniuses to exhibit common sense or to cope with practicalities. His expectations for people were beyond what most could ever provide for him, so I suppose he was both disappointed and despairing of making ordinary connections with people.
While at home, he spent most of his hours in his library, reading, studying and writing. His self-imposed loneliness included drinking, and at times he became a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde personality. Unfortunately, that behavior alienated me and some others like me. Still, there’s no denying that he was an interesting person, whom one would very much like to get to know. Some did, and because their forgiveness knew no bounds, these are the ones who will miss him the most. … and so it goes.
Jun 2, 2009
Groundcovers
We were in Bloomington on Sunday, and after brunching with Miki and Kevin, we toured their back yard. It's a shadowy hideaway with walkways and ponds and quiet, secret corners where one can rest and ponder and dream. Someone who owned the house in the past was gifted with imagination and created this lovely sanctuary. Their front yard is a study in contrasts, as it is brightly sunny and steeply sloping downward toward the sidewalk and the road. Miki spoke of wanting to replace the grass, which poses a danger to anyone mowing it, with a groundcover, perennials, or perhaps even making a series of terraces, as their neighbors have done. She requested information about groundcovers; thus, this series of pictures.
This first picture was meant as a caution rather than a suggestion. English Ivy is the chosen groundcover for many people, but I find it obnoxiously invasive and extremely difficult to eradicate.
This low growing plant appears to be, and acts like, a groundcover, though it spreads very slowly. I've entitled this picture "Mystery (weed?)" and encourage its growth simply because I find it to be a pretty addition to my front yard.
This may be creeping thyme... or some variety of thyme... The leaves are thyme-like and when crushed their scent approximates the smell of thyme.
This is a shade and moisture-loving groundcover called Ribbon Grass (or Dwarf Garters, which I find amusing). It's easy to take cuttings from existing stands, and it's hardy and slow to spread. I like the contrast of light and darker greens.
I found no explanation in my gardening books of why this is called Bishop's Weed. It grows about a foot tall and in the early summer it blooms with a stalk topped with what looks to me like a smaller version of Queen Anne's Lace. It can be invasive, but is also easily contained by planting it next to a foundation and surrounding it with rocks or some sort of edging. The leaves will start to get brown edges in dry, hot weather, but that doesn't harm the plant; in fact, a good deep watering will solve the problem.
This closely resembles what my books call Scotch Moss, other than the fact that my planting blooms yellow, while the books picture white blossoms. It grows thickly, forming hillocks as the stalks lay over on themselves. Partial shade and plenty of water are necessary for this groundcover, as with any variety of moss.
I believe this is the most popular groundcover around here, possibly because it is so hardy and will grow in sun or shade. I found some growing by an old, deserted farmhouse and barn, and helped myself to some starts. It has many names, including Common Periwinkle, Vinca Minor and Creeping Myrtle. It blooms in the summer, (periwinkle blue, of course), and grows thickly enough to choke out any noxious weeds that try to compete.
My personal favorite is this groundcover, called Ajuga Reptans or Bugleweed. There is more than one variety, but this picture and the next show the deep green and purplish leaves that appeal to me. It spreads by runners and establishes itself wherever it finds compatible soil. It's also easy to start with rooted cuttings. It can tolerate some sun, but for optimum performance it prefers mostly shade.
...and that's your lesson for the day. There WILL be a test. :)
This first picture was meant as a caution rather than a suggestion. English Ivy is the chosen groundcover for many people, but I find it obnoxiously invasive and extremely difficult to eradicate.
This low growing plant appears to be, and acts like, a groundcover, though it spreads very slowly. I've entitled this picture "Mystery (weed?)" and encourage its growth simply because I find it to be a pretty addition to my front yard.
This may be creeping thyme... or some variety of thyme... The leaves are thyme-like and when crushed their scent approximates the smell of thyme.
This is a shade and moisture-loving groundcover called Ribbon Grass (or Dwarf Garters, which I find amusing). It's easy to take cuttings from existing stands, and it's hardy and slow to spread. I like the contrast of light and darker greens.
I found no explanation in my gardening books of why this is called Bishop's Weed. It grows about a foot tall and in the early summer it blooms with a stalk topped with what looks to me like a smaller version of Queen Anne's Lace. It can be invasive, but is also easily contained by planting it next to a foundation and surrounding it with rocks or some sort of edging. The leaves will start to get brown edges in dry, hot weather, but that doesn't harm the plant; in fact, a good deep watering will solve the problem.
This closely resembles what my books call Scotch Moss, other than the fact that my planting blooms yellow, while the books picture white blossoms. It grows thickly, forming hillocks as the stalks lay over on themselves. Partial shade and plenty of water are necessary for this groundcover, as with any variety of moss.
I believe this is the most popular groundcover around here, possibly because it is so hardy and will grow in sun or shade. I found some growing by an old, deserted farmhouse and barn, and helped myself to some starts. It has many names, including Common Periwinkle, Vinca Minor and Creeping Myrtle. It blooms in the summer, (periwinkle blue, of course), and grows thickly enough to choke out any noxious weeds that try to compete.
My personal favorite is this groundcover, called Ajuga Reptans or Bugleweed. There is more than one variety, but this picture and the next show the deep green and purplish leaves that appeal to me. It spreads by runners and establishes itself wherever it finds compatible soil. It's also easy to start with rooted cuttings. It can tolerate some sun, but for optimum performance it prefers mostly shade.
...and that's your lesson for the day. There WILL be a test. :)
Jun 1, 2009
Roses, Roses
Whether walking south down the pathway, coming in the front door....
or walking north, going out to the car or the garden or the shed....
...these rose bushes are there to please you and bring joy to your day. Their tiny, tiny blossoms grow in clusters like miniature bouquets. The blooms continue all summer, whether you "deadhead" the old blossoms or not, but the bushes look much better, of course, if the old blossoms are removed. Under the bushes is a thick mat of Ajuga, one of the best ground covers around. It keeps the weeds down and helps hold moisture for the roses' roots.
This has been a week of new flowers showing up. The daylilies have started, too, so we're in for quite a show. Hurray for June!
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